An ode to my husband

I don't have a poem, but I do have a lot of praise and deep feelings for my Matthew.  

Our 2 year anniversary was last week and I have been wanting to spit this out on here since.  

All words will come out and fall short of what they really mean.  I'll go with some simple truths...

 My husband is incredible.  Our marriage has continuously gotten better since day one.  I think this is because my husband is so incredible.  He blows me away constantly with how unselfish he is.  With how constant his love is for me and Griffin.  With how strong he is.  Matt is also so encouraging to me.  He is so supportive of me.  He is so devoted to me and Griffin.  He is a man who does just as much, maybe even more, house chores and baby duties as me.  He is so secure, so stable.  He is so kind.  He is so truthful.  He is so gentle.  

I have been appreciating deeply so much lately how much he likes me.  I think that maybe I might do this thing where I am constantly seeking peoples approval of me.  As I reflect over the past, I think that maybe I might have always been trying to be someone who was liked.  And now for the first time in my life I have the first person that KNOWS every thing, part, ounce, of me( I am sure there are things about me that I don't even know)  and he approves of me, he likes me, he loves me, just because he does.  He really loves me and LIKES me!  Not because I do something fun, or because I am pretty, or because I dance well,  or whatever I have done in the past looking for approval.  Do you know how good this feels?  I catch myself realizing the reason, my motivation, for doing something, and I stop and I think,  I don't have to do this, Matt likes me just because he does.  He chooses to like me every second of his existence and it has nothing to do with me, it has everything to do with him and God probably.  Do you have any idea how freeing this is to me?  How restful this is for me?  How healing this is for me?  How healthy this is for me?  

All of his wonderfulness encourages and inspires me everyday.  To never give up and to be a better person.    

I can't believe this is my life.  I can't believe this is where I am.  

And tonight I was reminded (that reminder came from a sweet miracle baby boy himself named Rhyder who needs lots of prayers)  of what a miracle and blessing Griffin is.  We were all laying on the floor together.  The house to just us.  Watching Yo Gabba Gabba.  Our wonderful cat sleeping so cute on the couch.  It was a wonderful thing to be reminded of.  And then after the show Griffin took off crawling ever so fast all around the kitchen floor.  Under the kitchen table, through the chairs, around the island.  I was reminded about where he came from, three hospitalizations, to crawling on his own.  I should never forget how much I have.  

P.S. - Our anniversary is on the same day as Rick and Terri's ( Matt's parents)  just 28 years later.  And I want to say that they are very much a part of all that has blessed me and Matt and Griffin.  It feels like me and griffin were meant to be here with them as well. 

Sew it to me!

I took my first sewing class on Saturday at this fabulous place!  I loved LOVED it!  I made a clutch purse for Griffin, well Matt calls it his murse ( his man purse), but I kind of thought it looked like an envelope and lately Griffin loves putting things into other things and opening and shutting things, so this thing-a-ma-jig is perfect! And now I know what sewing machine I want to purchase!  The people were so nice and friendly, and the class was not intimidating at ALL!  I really hope it was the start to something.  

I apologize for the oodles of pictures...but I just love them and am no good at decisions!

Explosions of Movement

I feel like every time I turn around lately Griffin is doing something new, moving more, moving in a new way.  I can not even begin to describe how proud I am of him.  He works so hard and has so much motivation and perseverance.  He is teaching his Mommy the joy in being patient and that everything is OK.  I love him and I sometimes can not believe that this is my life, it's to incredible.

Here is a video of his latest moves!  It is quite lengthy so do not feel obliged to watch it all.  If you feel, you could watch 30 seconds or a couple minutes, but I just wanted the whole thing on here for me.   And I couldn't figure out how to upload it all together so I had to split it up into two videos.  

Look who found...

the DVD cabinet!

I love watching him play and discover:)

To anyone who reads, sorry I have not been blogging much, we have been working hard on our house :), it actually feels like people live in it now!

Funny Little Thing

Let me paint this picture with words for you....

The So You Think You Can Dance Finale is blaring loudly on the T.V. You see, I must keep the volume very high during this show as to not miss a single beat! At 7:15 I check to see if Griffin wants a bottle and he does not so I let him play on the ground below me. He is having a blast rolling around, scooting around, playing with bunches of toys, by my feet. I let him play freely for about an hour and then I try again with the bottle. He was giving no cues that he was hungry or sleepy but I just figured he must be hungry because it had been quiet a while since he last ate. Sometimes play can be so distracting :) Well at 8:15 he drank his bottle and fell sound asleep in my arms, while the T.V was, yep, still blaring loudly. I didn't even see this coming. He was not rubbing his eyes or whining or anything! Well after about 10 minutes of him sleeping in my arms ( I just kept thinking, this T.V is too loud, surely he will pop up awake any second) I thought I need to grab something to eat and Griffin you need your jammies on and to get ready for bed. So I thought I will lay him on the ground, on his blanket, and then surely you will wake up. Nope, as you can tell, he didn't wake up, he he he, which was perfectly fine, I was just so surprised! He slept on the ground for 45 minutes with the T.V, yep you guessed it, still blaring. (the show really is a lot better when the volume is turned up all the way!) It was probably one of the cutest things ever, one of the sweetest moments ever. I cleared out all of his toys, snapped a few photos, and laid next to him, to watch the rest of my show:) And if the sleeping was sweet, you can bet that having him wake up while I got to look in his eyes was even more sweet!

Here's to sweet moments! Thank you for reading :)

Special Visitors

This past week some of my favorite people in the world were staying at my house with me! And that is my little sisters and brother! Melissa (almost 17), Monica (12), and Mitchell (almost 9). I can not say enough how much I loved having them over, or how much Griffin loved having them over, or how much Matt loved having them over. I also don't think I can adequately describe just how incredible these people are. One way I put it, is if every child were like them I really think families would have 15 kids! They are sweet, and loving, and well behaved, they listen, they help. They are so patient with me and Griffin and how our life is right now. They are so good to each other that it is touching.

Griffin just ate them up! He loved all of the attention they gave him. They encouraged him to sign "more" and to eat and to clap. They bring such a positive loving energy to any place they go and Griffin just absorbed it all in!

We all had snow cones, we watched two really good movies, The Secret Life of Bees ( one of my personal favorites), and Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, we went swimming, we went to an animal shelter to look for a potential cat for me, matt, and Griffin, and Mitchell took over 100 photos of him self with my macbook.

5 years ago me being their big sister was the most important relationship in my life, I treasured and held dear being a big sister to them. Where as now, I am a mother and a wife and those come before me being a big sister. But I took my role as their sister seriously and I loved that role I got to play for some time when I lived at home with all of them. It actually has been very hard for me on the inside to have to let that go in ways. But it is a good feeling to have, ya know when something hurts but you are thankful that it hurts because that hurt reminds you of such a special time in your life. And now they have found their special roles amongst each other, rather than being the little sisters and brother, they are now the bigger ones in ways.

Matt said to me they are so lucky to have a big sister like you but really I am the lucky one to have them as little sisters and brother. I would be blessed to even know them! I love you guys and always will! I hope you had a good time, thanks for visiting!

A day to ourselves...

So many of our days are filled with therapy and doctors appointment, and errands to run, and things to do that when we have a day with no where to go and no where to be except right where we are it just feels so so good.

Griffin had the best day today. He didn't get woken up from his naps ( which happens a lot on days when we have appointments). He ate a lot of food! And he played, played, played. Towards the end of the night he started acting so silly. I couldn't believe I was the only one able to witness it.

Here are a few pictures to go along with this...




Griffin styled his hair all by himself using not gel but applesauce!






Griffin hugging, wanting to be picked up, and just looking cute!



Daddy's favorite cuddle bug!!




And last but definitely not least...Fun water play on our very cool splash pad!!!

I am so thankful for this day! And I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend:)